Friday, December 30, 2005

False Prophets (ranting to you folks because if I go off on someone I'll make her cry and then I'd feel like shit)

One of the things that annoys me about some of my fellow Christians is their inconceivable inability to distinguish a False Prophet from a false idol.

The Bible warns us against both. But so many Christians don’t see the delineation that it scares me. So let’s clarify shall we? A false idol (or you could just say "idol" since presumably they're all false) would be someone or something that leads a Christian AWAY from their faith. Examples might include: Satanic worship, greed, pornography, hedonism; or if you are the type to see other religions as "the path to hell" this might also include anything non-Christian like say Buddhism, Judaism or Islam.

I’m not saying that I agree with that all those things are idolotrous nor will I debate what really goes in the Idol category but from a fundamentalist Christian standpoint I could see how these things could lead a Christian directly away from their professed faith. They either displace the values of Christ or refute the faith entirely (as in other religions). For this reason I don’t think false idols are really much of a threat to Christians. I mean they are obvious. They are so easy to spot it’s pathetic. They are the big red flashing “DANGER” signs for religious Christian fervor. We respond to them with a universal, "DUH!"

False Prophets on the other hand are far more insidious. They masquerade as Christians. They quote Bible verses. They start holy wars. They claim to be doing God’s work even though their actions seem to profit them more than they do the church. They turn a blind eye to injustice. And they do it all right under the noses of, and often with the overt approval of people who genuinely want to please Christ. The False Prophet doesn’t want you to renounce your faith, he wants to pervert it! He will make you a tool of the Enemy. Under his care your chilled Christian heart will learn to judge others mercilessly. You’ll mindlessly drive lost souls away from Christ or else pervert them as well.

The everyday Christian hears the False Prophet shout, “Honk if you love Jesus!!” and he/she HONKS like a crack addicted goose. The False Prophet sends an email claiming that CBS canceled Touched By An Angel because it was glorifying God and some atheist (who has oddly enough been dead for 10+ years) had protested it. In his/her righteous indignation the everyday Christian madly spams everyone in their address book with this lie without bothering to spend like 10 seconds to type in “http://www.snopes.com/” to see if it’s true or not; completely forgetting that the show hasn’t been on in like three years and the 9th commandment clearly states “thou shalt not bear false witness”.

The False Prophet claims that Jesus is his co-pilot as he orders the deaths of innocent people who stand in the way of his profiteering while ignoring the slaughter of other innocents who have nothing to offer him. The False Prophet places a magnifying glass over the lives of gays in love in order to distract the everyday Christian from the fact that he is robbing the poor and the elderly and decimating God's good earth.

The Bible doesn’t warn us about the dangers of false idols in the Last Days. It warns us about the dangers of False Prophets. False idols may be an opportunity for proselytizing and missionary work but they are no big threat to our salvation. Do not fear those who can destroy the body, fear those who can destroy the soul. Those who would use our faith against us are counting on us to be lazy. Certainly we are to be as innocent at doves, but we have to be as cunning as serpents. We are to take nothing for granted. Sometimes I think we as Christians are just so damn happy to hear somebody, anybody say “Thank You Jesus!” that we just “pishaw!” the bad behavior that is muddying up our shoes by association. It’s gotten so bad that the everyday Christian is actually apologizing for and rationalizing the sins of False Prophets. It’s a doomed path, if everyday Christians keep down that road, they’ll burn with them too.

Lucifer was an ANGEL of LIGHT. Let’s remember that. If he showed up at your door sporting horns, a pointy tail and a pitchfork you’d say, “Get thee off my porch Satan!” Right? That’s so hopeless he’s not gonna try that. The Devil is S-M-A-R-T and not only that he’s a snappy dresser. When he knocks on a Christian door he’s gonna be wearing his Sunday Best, carrying his Bible, there’ll be a cross around his neck. And after he offers to paint the blood of the lamb on your door he’s gonna ask you to sign a petition to fire that Lesbian schoolteacher who’s teaching your dyslexic son to read when no one else could and in exchange he’ll give you four tickets to a screening of Narnia. That doesn’t mean we can’t trust each other. But it does mean that we need to be on guard. For the Devil and his False Prophets are big toothy roving lions (and I ain't talking about Aslan, folks) looking for a tasty Christian morsel to maul.

But we’ll know true Christians by their love. The love of Christ that accepts and forgives others who can’t/won’t/don’t live up Gods standards. The love that would never send valiant men and women to sacrifice themselves in order to line the coffers of the wealthy. The love that asks WWJD instead of deciding to torture a prisoner of war. The love that sacrifices of itself. The love that tenderly cares for the poor. The love that rescues children. The love that delivers justice with mercy. That’s what you look for and if you don’t see that then check the size of their teeth.

13 comments:

Brookelina said...

Merry New Year Girl!

Foreverdad said...

Very interesting CA. I probably have a different take than yours. Not sure though since you did not "name any of the false prophets you speak of, and I did not want to read between the lines as I often do...trying to stop that for my future blogging days. I would like to add that idols are easy to see in others but are much more difficult to see in ourselves. And they are not always obvious. They can be much more common place (less obvious) than you think... work, pursuit of enjoyment, technology, things. Food can be an idol...It can generally be described as anything that crowds out God as a general everyday practice. Hmmm, no more it is your blog. Thanks for the post!

Kushibo said...

Wow, this dovetails with a lot of what I've been saying.

And the thing is, my OC Baptist mother did send me the "Touched by an Angel" thing and I immediately went to snopes.com, looked it up, and sent it back to her!

Enjoy the rain down in San Diego (is it raining there?) and be glad you're not freezing your buns off here in Seoul!

Girl With An Alibi said...

Merry New Year to you too, Ms Wose.

Dad, you are quite right on the idol topic. Right now, Starbucks Lattes in the morning are like 2 steps away from idol status for me. I'd better be careful.

Kushibo- Wow! Seoul, huh? Cool! I'm like officially international now! And yes it has been rainy here. The sun is out for now though. Thank for stopping by and Stay warm!

Dex2177 said...

I'm guessing you don't have tickets to that Super-Church stadium hoorah, huh? ;-)

As for the "path to hell" those wwho preach that sort of thing inevitably hate gays as well WHILE wearing clothing of mixed fibre and having the full platter at Red Lobster. Just more cherry-picking amidst the muck to suit their bigotry and missing the message.

The scary part is that that's the fervant mob that rises up to stone to death the scientist heretics and contrarians to the fervor such as yourself. No one likes a killjoy, lol. It isn't the reasonable people who burn the witches but oh well.

Dex2177 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
John said...

very interesting perspective.

The Unseen One said...

Just remember to apply God's standard, and don't confuse it with your own.

The Unseen One said...

And out of curiosity, who would you consider a "false prophet" in modern society and why?

Girl With An Alibi said...

NH- I guess I would be particularly wary of Pat Robertson for one. Anyone who actually thinks that 911 and AIDS are God's punishment for homosexuality, atheism, etc.; who speaks out against aid for unwed mothers and yet claims to be pro-life; who calls for the assassination of foreign heads of state among other very un-Christlike statements is someone to steer clear of in my opinion. The fact that so many good Christian people listen to him and repeat that heartless non-sense like it was from God Himself really scares me.

I'm not saying he's doing it deliberately, and I'm not saying that he secretly worships Satan. But I think he enjoys the power of his own position far too much and his abuse of it can cause otherwise compassionate people to say some pretty horrific things.

My conscience really trembles at the thought of him. I didn't always feel that way either. I was raised with Pat Robertson tapes in the house and listening to him and other TV evangilists. But I found myself full of fear and bitterness toward others after listening to him and my conscience practically screamed at me for it.

The Spiritual sensation is kind of like swallowing a chocolate truffle and realizing it's filled with putrid puss.

gone said...

Name Hidden - I think Alibi points out well that God said to beware of falso prophets, not necessarily to name them and make a gigantic list for later reference and review. The spirit of the warning is to beware and to not simply accept what people who claim to be of Christ are saying. That would be casting judgement and God says not to do that either. Heck, Alibi could be your false prophet.

The point is to beware.

Great post, by the way.

Girl With An Alibi said...

"Heck, Alibi could be your false prophet."

BWHAHAHAHAH! (rubs hands together maniacally and drools)

Exactly CBT! But I really don't trust Pat Robertson, personally. Though I don't think everyone should take my word for it either. We are each responsible for making our own choice to follow a particular leader whether religous or political. I don't follow anyone blindly nor do I take anyone's "word for it" (other than my Starbuck Barista, of course).

The Unseen One said...

CBT, when someone puts up a list of specific attributes, usually they have someone in mind.

And as for "Don't Judge", those have to be the most taken out of context words in the bible. You must look at the context of the words used or read it in the original greek (krino, anakrino, diakrino). Kind of like how the english word love is translated from four different greek words. Example: Benny Hinn can be judged (diakrino) as a false prophet because he made some predictions with date ranges on them, and they didn't come true. I can judge (anakrino) not to get involved with people who are thieves. However, I am not permitted to judge (krino) someone as a lazy slob because they don't dress in a suit when they go to church.

GWAA, yeah, I have to agree with you. Several things Robertson says aren't biblical.